Tuesday, June 30, 2015

FAQ: Did you ever worry for Tyrus?

Today's FAQ comes from one of you! Right before Ty and I set off for Colorado, this question was asked of Rebekah, and I was just as eager to hear the answer, as it was never a question that I had considered before. Rebekah's response is such a beautiful view into her heart and love for her son; she inspires me more than she'll ever know. Here is the question that was asked:

Those of us that follow this sweet amazing blog (I'm sure you do also!) so respect and admire the raw emotion Rebekah shares in her writings - going back to when they first had LJ, some of the trials, then with Sweet Boy and Missy. Did you ever worry/fear it was too difficult for Tyrus, maybe it would adversely effect him, or think maybe he deserved more stability? I absolutely mean no disrespect, and love the Pinchback family. Just wonder how you felt reading Rebekah's posts

Rebekah (Ty's first mother) responds:

Thank you for your question. I can understand the angle you are coming from; however, the thought actually never crossed my mind that Tyrus was possibly in an unstable environment. I always knew that Rebekah and Ben would have more children. I never wanted Tyrus to be an only child so you can imagine my excitement when he became an older brother. In my experience, families go through emotionally challenging times no matter how the family was put together (adoption or by natural means). What I am trying to say is, every family has the possibility of having a child that has an emotional need, or autism, or down syndrome, or any other unfortunate circumstance. Does this bring instability to a family? Absolutely not! I think if dealt with properly, it can actually bring a family closer. Tyrus is a very special boy. He has incredible patience and a nurturing spirit. I know that Tyrus was put in the Pinchback family because he was supposed to be a big brother to those who need his unconditional love and gentle personality. I have never once questioned the stability of his home. I did, however, question the stability of my home at the time of his birth and that is why I chose open adoption.


If you would like to have either Rebekah or me respond to your question, please email or leave it in the comment section below.


  1. What a beautiful answer written with insight and love.

  2. Ty is blessed to have two beautiful MOM's who love him unconditionally! Best to the two of you always!

  3. Rebekah and Rebekah - your love for the Lord, for your children, and for each other teaches me new things every day. Thank you, again, for sharing this journey with all of us. You are both a blessing to me! Julie Harper

  4. That is just so powerful, amazing, wonderful, so many adjectives and really no words can fully say how awesome Ty's first Mother's heart is.

  5. Love this! What a wonderful woman!