Whirlwind.

It's been a very strange month of ups and downs. Our family has been pressing the hem of heaven so tightly it would prove worn if released. We have been in constant prayer over finding a new home for our growing family and a permanent home for LJ's little sister, Mia. We have been on our knees, on behalf of both, for over a year, but breakthrough has been slow.

In the same month (this month) we got encouraging news about Mia and then it was discouraging...and then back to encouraging. Last week, we found our dream home. Truly. It was quirky and non-traditional and felt like the perfect space to raise our non-traditional family. It needed work, but had loads of space, inside and out. It captured my heart, the minute I walked in the door.

Ben and I were laughing. After a year of waiting and begging praying, we had finally pushed through, and wouldn't it be just like God to deliver our home and daughter in the same week?

That was last week.

We were shocked when our offer was accepted without contingency and thankful that, although the crazy foster care system seemed set on allowing Mia to fall through the cracks, our caseworker helped us advocate otherwise. We praised God for his favor.

And then this week came...

We, sadly, had to withdraw our offer on the house, after spending three hours with the inspector, on Saturday. And, today, we were notified that Mia will be adopted by one of two families - neither of which is ours.

Sunday and Monday were difficult days for me. I had already betrothed myself to the house and had, mentally, moved our things in. It took me a couple days to get through the heartbreak. I wasn't angry or resentful with God - I was thankful (SO thankful) that he had spared us from harm - I was just, incredibly, sad. By the end of the day, yesterday, I was back to myself and although not ready to dive into the house hunt, again, my optimism returned.

God is faithful.

Strangely, when the news of Mia came, today, my immediate (and continued) reaction was complete peace. We have seen too much to doubt God's plan. I really want her to be in our family, but we've tried (not always successfully) to be neutral in our prayers for her. That God would be swift in bringing Mia a permanent family. From what I heard, today, both families would be a wonderful fit that would allow her to be with birth sisters. I couldn't ask for more.

Over the last year, we received such conflicting information about Mia, her whereabouts and whether or not there were other siblings with her. Our caseworker has been a gift from God and after the second new caseworker was assigned to Mia's adoption (after the termination hearing a couple of weeks ago), she, personally, drove to the assigned agency to read through Mia's file, herself. As if that wasn't touching enough, she affirmed a truth, today, that I am eternally grateful for. After spending her morning reading through this family's case, it is "unclear" why LJ was separated from his four sisters - who all had parental rights terminated a few weeks ago...together. I had no idea. I thought all the children, apart from Mia, had been adopted. Two are older than LJ and two are younger. All four will likely be adopted together. It doesn't make sense. There is no defining cause for his separation from the family.

No defining cause, that is, except the all powerful-ever true, hand of God.

For whatever reason, God saw fit for LJ to be in our family. God plucked him from his abandonment and called him son. He stamped redeemed on his file and whispered favor into his future. I am in awe at the goodness and love of our God.

I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
    where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let my foot slip—
    he who watches over me will not slumber;

indeed, he who watches over Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord watches over me—
    the Lord is my shade at my right hand;

the sun will not harm me by day,
    nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep me from all harm—
    he will watch over my life; 
the Lord will watch over my coming and going
    both now and forevermore.

 - Psalm 121

Thank you, Father....