Before I dive into what I want to share about Ty and LJ's relationship, I would like to say that I consider this blog an online journal of not only our experiences as a family, traveling through adoption, but it also reflects the growth and stretching that I experience as a woman, mother, and person of faith. Naturally, when I chose to keep such a public record of my heart cries, I opened myself up to every shade of criticism and encouragement. Most criticism passes moderation because I find value in discussion. I don't, however, post mean-spirited comments that direct malice toward Ben, Ty, LJ, or Rebekah (thankfully, those are few and far between, now that we're on the path to foster adoption).
I say all that to say, this is my space to write from my heart. It doesn't always look or sound pretty. It's not perfect because I'm not perfect. And it may not always be a good representation of adoption, parenting, or Christ...but it is a representation of me...my life, my heart, my struggles.
Yes, Ben and I are being stretched as people and parents, right now...but we wouldn't change a thing. Ty and LJ are the most valuable gifts we've ever been entrusted with. And although I do not subscribe to the theory that God made them for me, I do believe he brought them into our life and will help us grow them for His purpose.
Lately, I've had lots of questions about how LJ and Ty are bonding. I want to talk a little about that, today!
God has given Tyrus an incredible capacity to love. He is the most tenderhearted, perceptive boy I know and God is using him in our family. He says things like, "Mom. I always wanted a brother like LJ" or "Mom, are you so happy to have two boys?"
Although LJ is much more adventurous than Ty and only young by two months, he looks to his big brother for a lot of direction. Lately, LJ has been saying, "Mom, Ty is my best friend." We can thank Cars for introducing the concept!
Their brotherhood is equally beneficial.
LJ is extremely different than Ty in personality and activeness. It has been really neat to watch Ty extend his limits and be willing to try new things because of LJ. One of LJ's best qualities is that he's game for anything. Food, adventure, new experiences - LJ will try it...and now, so will Ty (most of the time).
LJ, naturally, requires constant reassurance and symbolism of home, right now. Ty has become a healthy security for LJ. Work, church, and date-nights are a breeze because LJ always has a piece of home. In the last five months, LJ has never been without me, Ben, or Ty. I think it has really helped in shaping his definition of home and family.
They play SO well together. From cars to dinos to master chef, the boys are buds. Their new game has been playing "daddy". One of them pretends to be the daddy and the other pretends to be a baby. I was cracking up, the other day listening to them talk like Ben.
I love watching the interaction.
One trait that has really surfaced in LJ is loyalty. Last week, we were at a children's museum and another boy came by to get into the car that Ty was driving. LJ shoved him to the side and yelled something "brother" and sat down close, next to Ty. He did get in trouble for the push, but his demonstration of protectiveness was interesting to me.
My constant prayer is that they will be mighty men of God. I hug them and kiss them and lay hands on them every chance I can. I know their love for each other and God is enough to change the world.