Your Questions Answered

Each week, I have readers ask me questions - be it through comments or emails. I try to answer as many as I can, but due to time constraints I often have to skip over some. I'm going to start doing a monthly Q&A post, so if you've got questions, now's the time to ask!

Here's what's up for our first Q&A session:

What do you think of the song "From God's Arms, To My Arms, To Yours." It was originally written by Michael Mclean, but has been rerecorded by other artists, including Marie Osmond?

I had actually never heard of this song before and had to do a Google search. The lyrics are beautiful! I'm embarrassed to say, I had no idea Marie Osmond adopted her children - how cool!

Where do you guys live?

Michigan.

How did you and Ben choose your agency?

We first decided to adopt domestically. It was really important to us to have a newborn. We selfishly wanted every minute, every first, with our soon-to-be child. Adopting a 6-12 month old, internationally, would have been okay the second time around, but we wanted to experience full parenthood the first time.

Once we knew domestic was the best fit for us, we weighed the pros and cons of using a national agency versus an in-state agency. We decided to go the route of an in-state agency because we knew out-of-state adoptions could be more complicated and expensive. (Ironically, we chose a Michigan based agency to avoid the out-of-state hoopla and then Rebekah found us...and lived out of state!)

Once those two factors were decided - domestic, in-state adoption. We simply looked for the agency that did the most adoptions, in Michigan. (We did meet with and research the agency - we didn't just sign on the dotted line!)

What kind of camera do you use?

My wonderful husband bought me a Nikon D60, last year, and I couldn't love it more! My favorite shots are taken with a longer 75-300 lens because they lend well to the artistic eye. My bestie and I took a photography class at our local community college to get wised up on shooting manually - very helpful. I'm a long cry from professional, but it's been a really fun hobby (and has saved us a lot of money on buying professional pictures!)

Do you have to take calls from the birth father?

We don't have to do anything. Sadly, many adoptive parents don't deliver on promises made pre-baby...and there are no legal ramifications. We continue to foster relationships with both of Ty's birthparents because we feel it's in Ty's best interest. If he could talk, there isn't a question I wouldn't be able to answer, right now. I hope that our relationship with his first parents adds fullness and health to his story. We are very thankful for the contact we have, as long as we have it.

If God allowed you to get pregnant, now, how would you feel?

This is not an easy answer. My gut response is "I don't know." Having a baby would be, of course, amazing and wonderful...not to mention miraculous. But. God has put such a purpose in my heart for adoption. There are so many orphans in need of family. And we're family! For months, God has been stirring my heart toward our bleeding foster system and the need found within. I want God to use me! I know that we've made an impact on the lives of Rebekah and her family...I want to do more. I heard a missionary speak,yesterday, of his time in Haiti. He was walking to his helicopter when a woman held out her dying son and begged the missionary to take him - to give him health and a better life. The missionary talked about the impact it left on his heart.

Whether domestic or international, there are SO many kids in need of homes. I want our home to be that home. I can't rescue them all...but I can rescue one...or two...or ten!

Back to the question. Pregnancy would thrill me because it would be a quick, no-worry solution to giving Ty a brother or sister. But, if I'm answering honestly, I'd have to mention the possability of disappointment. If we were able to birth a whole clan of Pinchbacks, we would not be so aggressive at welcoming the fatherless into our home. And the Father needs us to do just that.

Can life get any better?
No way. I'm walking in the complete fullness of God. Any extra blessings that come our way will just add equal amounts of joy. There is nothing better than waking up to a squealing, happy boy in the room next door.



Feel free to leave your questions in the comments section for next month's Q&A.