Friday, May 23, 2008

Day 25

I wish I would have started blogging my heartache earlier. Over the past several weeks I have been so inspired reading other blogs of women (and men) that have stories that mirror mine. There is such a connection...a knowing, when I read my struggle walked out in the lives of others. I felt so isolated for so long. Who knew online journals could be so liberating?

I eagerly read through the pages of a new found "friend" last night [Glenna] and found answer to a question that has been weighing heavy on my mind the last few weeks: to decorate a nursery or not to decorate. Glenna wrote [first understand this woman's story is so much my own, I related to her on every level]: "I spend a few minutes in this room every day, sitting in my rocker and praying for our baby, the birth mom, and us as future parents. It is SUCH a relief to have hope for our future." That was all I needed to seal the deal. I promplty made my way downstairs where Ben was watching the Pistons game, plopped down, and with full sincerity asked Ben if he would buy me a rocking chair. Now, mind you, the sequence of events made full sense to me, Ben however, responded with "For crocheting or something?" Stunned that he hadn't followed my thought pattern, I had to laugh! I explained that I wanted a rocker so that I could sit in the baby's room and pray. Not quite realizing the impact my simple request would have, he replied with "sure." God, I love him.

I don't care how long I have to walk by an empty room...that room--that chair--that life is going to be bathed in prayer.

So, I'm in the market for a new chair.

6 comments:

  1. Funny, I was going to link you to Glennas blog - your journeys sure do have their simularities.

    I couldn't help but cry reading your post, bathing that chair in prayer...whew. After reading her post the other day, I asked Scott should we do something - small even to have something to touch and anchor us in this dream.

    ((HUGS)) praying for your purchase...and ya know it wouldn't hurt to crochet a little in it too!

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  2. Awesome Rebekah! That is so sweet! (And powerful!)

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  3. Someone told us that we'd need "serious psychological counseling" if we decoratrd the nursery too early. we laughed that off and got busy decorating.

    For us, it was preparation for a baby that we KNEW God was going to bring us. It was no longer a question of IF, it was a matter of WHEN.

    Hope you find an awesome rocker for some quality "prayer prepration" for your little one!

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  4. i am so happy for you, after seeing that you had a blog and doing my best to catch up, i cant tell you what a peace i have about this. your hope and love is pouring out through your writing. i wish i could use better words to express what excitement i have for you and Ben! i can't wait to "follow" along with you guys as you blog your journey!

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  5. We had a nursery from the time we started ttc -- even through failed matches and placements I never regreted having the nursury- there were days I shut the door- but there were more days I went in there and felt - hope -- I printed out my favorite scripture and put it in the bed and would read it when I went in there! good luck on finding that chair!

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  6. We had the room done even before the paper work is done...it's actually a comfort to go in nightly and sit and talk for awhile.

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