Hoop Jumping

This week, Ty learned how to jump. He's been working on it for months, but up to this point his feet never left the ground at the same time - which resulted in a funny, squat-like gallop. Ty is so proud of his accomplishment. When we're out, he'll tell any stranger that will listen, "Look. Ty jump'n!"

I'm bottling his enthusiasm and applying it to the next chapter of our hoop-jumping adoption process.  I will say, adoption looks much different the second time around through God-is-faithful, mom lenses.

The process hasn't changed, but I sure have.

For me, the last several months were packed with responsibilities and class and marathon laundry nights. I had several bouts of near-anxiety attacks that left my chest heaving and my head swimming. To find my breath, I resigned my position at the new start-up agency I had mentioned before and laid down all things adoption to focus on getting through my studies and keeping my marriage intact. It's been a rough few months on all of us.

I was getting so discouraged by the foster adoption door-slamming, I had to take a five second time out to regroup. Because it's been so far between posts, I can't remember what I have and haven't shared. I'm going to give you a quick recap on where we're at as a family:

•  Ben and I are confident that God is calling us to adopt children from foster care.
• We are sure that fostering children is not for us at this time and are only looking to adopt wards of the state (the primary reason for this is that we both work full time, and while we know this isn't a deal-breaker as far as the state is concerned, it's not where we see God leading).
• We would like Ty to be our oldest child and realize this may make for a long process (Ty will only be 2 1/2 when we're licensed).
• We are open to all races and sibling groups
• Ty has been praying for a baby sister (we chalk it up to the many girl friends that surround him!)

Because God's faithfulness has been sewn deep into my heart, waiting for his plan to come to fruition has been easy (this time around). I know that God is beckoning us into the world of foster adoption. Whether that happens next month, next year, or in the next decade, I know that this seed will blossom and I'm content to wait (although recognizing that this post may come to haunt me). There are two parts of this adoption vision that have really taken root. The first is to adopt a sibling group that will otherwise be split up and the second is to adopt a teenager. I believe both desires are by God and foresee them playing out in the distant future.

When we signed up for adoption we didn't know what we were getting into, but now that we do, we don't want out. Knowing that this will be a lifelong passion, allows us to take the obstacles in stride.

And there are obstacles....

• Agencies (8 to be exact) don't want to work with us because we're not willing to sign-up as foster parents and we aren't willing to adopt a child over the age of 7 (at this time).
• A friend/social worker got permission from her supervisor to represent us, but before the home study can be updated we have to complete PRIDE training - which is only offered a half day each week at an hour impossible for us to attend.
• Every time I call DHS for answers I talk to six people before getting to the person who can answer my question.

Most of this investigative work happened at the tail end of my master's and it was just too much. I made all eight agency calls on the same day and by the end of it I felt suffocated. I was so overwhelmed with life that I threw God's vision back and told him we'd have to talk later. I needed to focus on the ending task before me. That was a few months ago.

Last week, out of nowhere, an urge to press on filled my heart. I came home and told Ben, "I'm ready to fight for our kids."

I am.

I'm full of hope and vision and know that God will finish the good work he has started.

I feel really good about our game plan, which I'll save for next time due to the length of this post! After multiple calls and some direct words to - let's call them - people of the system, we found representation for PRIDE Training and start next weekend.

I'm a little nervous, but mostly thoughtful when it comes to this new crisp page in our family book. We have to jump the hoops to pass through the system, but God is so much bigger than rules and statistics and tendencies. I know he's called us. I know we're willing. And I know there are a lot of kids in need of family...